Firstly, a great place to start is by putting your past disappointments behind you. A mistaken belief, that will keep you from gaining one aspect of self-control, is telling yourself that you’re a failure if you haven’t achieved all you wanted to date. Failure in the past does not condemn you to a lifetime of the same, however, focusing on past failures probably will. It’s like driving a car whilst looking in the rear-view mirror, like it or not it’s inevitable that you’ll crash. You have to leave your past where it belongs, firmly behind you without judgment, embarrassment nor discomfort.
Secondly, taking part in enjoyable activities. The main reason you do things is because you like to, it feels good and you want to experience the feelings and emotions that are associated with the act or activity. However, when you do it to excess, or know something’s bad for you but you still do it, you open the opportunity for addiction and the beginning of total loss for that which you say you desire which is Self-Control.
So, what can you do to help yourself?
Step one: You can start by admitting you have an issue and be specific about it. This can be challenging, but be bold enough to share it with someone, whether it be an issue with food, drink, drugs, words, your temper, money, exercise, sex, TV, clothes, time, pornography relationship with self and others– all these areas need you to be present with presence and Self-Control.
Steps two: Claiming back your self-control is accepting complete responsibility for your lack of self-control and admitting that you’ve got a problem. Playing the blame game does not get you off the hook, making excuses is a waste of time and energy and stunts your progress, and gives away your power. If you wait for someone or something else to change, you are going to stay stuck. However, if you take responsible you can bring about the change you want to see.
Step three: Make yourself accountable to someone. You may not like this step, but if you’ve been fighting a losing battle for a while, this is just the medicine you need. Find someone that you know, respect and importantly trust. Someone who will check up on you and encourage you in areas where you want more self-control. Having someone hold you accountable is tough, but it does works. Give this person permission to check up and check in with you and ask “How you’re doing?”
Knowing that someone has your back will enable you to grow in confidence and start believing that you can change. Watch your thoughts, they become your beliefs, watch your beliefs, they become your words, watch your words, they become your actions. The person who says, ‘I can’t do it,’ and the person who says, ‘I can do it,’ are both right. Your words have power.
In closing don’t let the sadness of your past and the fear of your future ruin the happiness of your present.
Posts
Post a Comment